Fear and Paranoia is NOT an Olympic sport YET

Have you got the fear?

Feeling paranoid isn’t an Olympic sport (yet) and if it was Britain would snatch every medal going. According to a 2010 survey by mental health charity mind, the recession sparked a huge rise in stress-related GP visits – two-thirds of which were made by women.
It’s official: we’re freaking out.
We all know The Fear – sweaty palms, a gurgling tummy, the dreadful certainty that you’ve done something “terrible”. And we all know how gipping these feelings can be.

Dr.David Harper from the Clinical Psycology department at the University of East London reckons that: “while worrying is a perfectly normal emotion to experience, extreme angst can be hugely deliberating. However, there are way of curbing it.
“Phew”!!

Here’s how to take The Fear down once in for all.

Catch it:
Next time you’re wondering why everyone likes someone more than you, stop and acknowledge you might be being a smidgen paranoid.

Check it:
Now’ve you identified the anxiety, look into it objectively. Does EVERYONE really like her more? why?

Change it:
what can you do about it? Do you care? your family/boyfriend prefer you, right? isn’t that what matters?

And remember it’s natural to worry about your life, about your job, about your children etc. But the most important is to keep your anxieties realistic. If they become all-consuming, it can border on a mental health issue.

How to deal with it:

Write down what’s bothering you, and then go and get a glass of water and come back and look at it again.
Chances are, what you’ve written down won’t seem so likely after all. Research also shows spending 20 minutes writing about your fears, you can boost your mental state and immune system as well.

5 most common regrets when you die! By Paulho Coelho

Blog by Paulho Coelho:

For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.

When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently, common themes surfaced again and again. Here are the most common five:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made.
From the moment that you lose your health, it is too late. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.

2. I wish I didn’t work so hard.

This came from every male patient that I nursed. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content. When deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.

This is your chance to do your best
Christina Aros

How do you treat yourself and others

This little story came to my facebook today and inspired me to pass it forward because I believe this message is not only to teach children but to teach adults as well. So I encourage you to take a look at the way you treat yourself and others. Do you treat them/yourself with respect or do you bully them or yourself. Even if you do it in the name of FUN it can still hurt people and leave scars. Even if it is just one small word or judgment to yourself or others it can still leave scars.

Sorry is a fantastic word and sometimes we don’t do things to hurt people deliberately. I just suggest that you consider your actions and behaviour towards yourself and others

Here’s the story:
A teacher in New York was teaching her class about bullying and gave them the following exercise to perform. She had the children take a piece of paper and told them to crumple it up, stamp on it and really mess it up but do not rip it. Then she had them unfold the paper, smooth it out and look at how scarred and dirty is was. She then told them to tell it they’re sorry. Now even though they said they were sorry and tried to fix the paper, she pointed out all the scars they left behind. And that those scars will never go away no matter how hard they tried to fix it. That is what happens when a child bully’s another child, they may say they’re sorry but the scars are there forever. The looks on the faces of the children in the classroom told her the message hit home

Do you really matter ?

YES YOU DO !!!

I don’t know if you’ve ever tried to be totally overruled and felt like people didn’t respect you, your ideas, your requests, your voice or your opinion.

The other day I had the most amazing client. Intelligent, beautiful, well spoken and very clever but she felt she didn’t matter to anyone. She truly believed she was worth nothing and no matter what she did or said, noone respected her or her opinion. She felt like saying no to people but always ended up saying yes, because she felt she didn’t had a choice and people would dislike her if she said no!

I told her a secret and I would like to share it with you as well. And you know what, let’s spread the word, don’t keep it a secret, pass it forward.

You can’t expect others to respect you if YOU don’t respect yourself

It all begins inside of you and you’re the one responsible for unlocking the lock to your greatness.
I asked her this:

Who is the person you respect the most in the entire world and her answer was Dalai Lama
How would you treat him?
Here is her answer:

I would treat him with respect, with love, talk nicely with a warm loving voice. I would make sure he was comfortable, making sure he had a beautiful place to meditate, surround him with love and care. Serve delicious healthy food and be the best host ever.

I looked at her and smiled but kept quiet for a couple of minuts and then asked her. Who is the host of your body and mind?

She started to cry silently and then a big smile appeared on her beautiful face. Christina I’m my own host! So I smiled even bigger and agreed with her

Today she called me and thanked me for opening her eyes to the difference she can make in her own life and that it all starts within her.

It’s the same for you! If you want more respect, if you want more love, if you want other people to listen to you I suggest you start doing it yourself. Be the person you respect and love the most in the world. Be the best host you can be, treat yourself, the way you would treat an honored guest.
You’re the most important person in your life, you’re the host of your body and mind: talk nicely to yourself, respect and love yourself, nourish yourself and be the best host you can be EVERY DAY!

YOU REALLY DO MATTER!

Do you want to learn more about respecting yourself have a look at www.fuckflinkeskolen.dk ( only in danish)

Do the REPOH

I truly believe that you choose how you want to live your life. It’s all about your habits, your values, your choices, your beliefs and your actions.

Do you want to be in charge of your own life? Of course you do !!
Do you want to have success in your life? Of course you do !!

I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone that didn’t want success or control over their own life!

So why is it that some people are better at it than others??

BECAUSE they have more ” WHY TO’s than WHY NOT TO’s

They perceive that there are more benefits of doing the things they want to do (another word for Why-To’s is Benefit)than costs of doing so (another word for Why-Not-To’s is Cost).

Your mind is like an infinite weighing machine—every moment, your mind is weighing your perceived benefit against your perceived cost of doing any behavior or activity you can think of. Do you see that every decision you make is built upon your Why-To’s and Why-Not-To’s?

To be in charge of your own life, to become successful, you need to adopt LEADERSHIP as your LIFESTYLE. You need to have more Why-To’s than Why-Not-To’s and one of the best way’s to create more Why-To’s is to REPOH

R epetition
E asy
P leasure
O ften
H abit

Because through REPETITION it becomes EASY. If it’s easy it is a PLEASURE. Then you’ll do it OFTEN, and that’s how it becomes a HABIT.

= REPOH!!

Thanks and love to Elise Droste for the inspiration to this blog. Elise told me that REPOH is the thoughts of Marlon Smith and that he inspired many teens during one of his motivational speeches when he was talking about leadership at the Global Youth Leadership Summit.

Fear Less – live more

I’ve created Club Courage so you can step out of your comfort zone, and into a life with more courage, more the real you, more success and much more happiness.

When people come up to me after my seminars or call me to ask me about coaching, they really want to change their life BUT they often find it so challenging to invest in themself.

Now you have the chance to dig deep into yourself, to discover your inner strength and passion, to live with more courage, success and happiness.

Read more about Club Courage http://arosbyaros.zenbilling.com/products/club-courage

Where is the LOVE ??

Saturday my children and I was on our way to the Hospital to see my dear friends newborn twingirls.
We stopped at the local shop to buy groceries and on the way out I slipped in something as silly as a cauliflower leave, someone accidentally dropped and I fell over in the parking lot

I’m sure it look really funny but one thing is sure it hurt like hell. As I was trying to save the bottles in the bag I hurt my hand and knee. I tell you I was down on the road for a long time because I tried to stay as calm as possible and handle the pain because I didn’t wanted to scare my children, that naturally were nervous.

When I finally got up, I saw several people in the parking lot filling gas on their cars but none felt the need to help me at all.
I know I can’t expect people to act like I would have. I’m just wondering how it got that far that we have enough in our own lives?

Then when I look at the terrible friday in Norway, I wonder even more.

Are we really that occupied living our own ego driven lives, that we forget about all other people?
Are we so busy that we just mind our own business?

Where is the LOVE for your neighbor?

My suggestion is that you do something to day to help and support another person,- or just give them a smile.

YOUR GREATNESS IS TRULY MY PASSION
Christina